Getting it Right on Mother's Day

If you want to know how to “Get It Right” on Mother’s Day. I have some very simple pieces of advice for you.

1.     Know who your mom isn’t.

2.     Know who your mom is.

3.     Make it more about her than you.

4.     Plan accordingly.

With all said, let’s start with a story, shall we?

Quite a few weeks ago, I went to Target in hopes of securing a Mother’s Day card before “all the good ones” were taken. (I assumed I had already purchased every Mother’s Day card Hallmark had to offer. #HallmarkPlatinumMember)

I wanted to get a really good card for her. Because she’s a really good mom. Every really good mom deserves a really good card. Right?

Well, yes. That, and I didn’t want to be interviewed on the evening news for why I was waiting until the last minute to thank the woman who gave birth to me. In fact, I remember watching the Jacksonville news one time a few years ago, and that happened. The news crew decided for some strange reason to interview people at the card aisles in Wal-mart and ask why they were waiting until the last minute to get cards. (News-worthy stories were obviously lacking that night. All must have been quiet on the Moncrief front. And we all know that Wal-mart breeds news-worthy action stories at any given time throughout the day.)  Anyway, that news story coverage has stayed with me all these years, and it has altered me in a few ways. One, I no longer watch the nightly news. I all of a sudden have better things to do. (Like blow-drying my hair.) Two, I no longer wait until the last minute to go card-shopping.

With all said, I assumed that going to Target a few weeks ago would give me an edge on the Mother’s Day card-collection-selection at Target. And it did. I found all sorts of cards. Seriously. All. Sorts. Of. Cards.

Some companies get pretty hilarious when it comes to thanking Moms. Some go all sentimental and sweet. :) Others just get kind of ridiculous. And ridiculous is kind of the theme I noticed this year with some of the Target Mother’s Day cards I found. You see, the reason they were ridiculous is this: a lot of them were aimed towards diva-moms.

The problem with this? My mom is not a diva. She’s very far from it, actually. My mom doesn’t wear makeup. She doesn’t wear showy jewelry on a regular basis. Or ever, really. She doesn’t sport around town in fancy-dancy clothing. She doesn’t drive a fancy car. She doesn’t wear high heels, unless someone’s getting married. She doesn’t make it a habit to make our house look like a magazine, entertain others, and/or hob-knob. She doesn’t do a whole long list of diva-mom stuff.

You want to know why? Because she’s not a diva-mom.

And you know what? That’s completely okay. (Side note: if your mom is a diva-mom, that’s completely okay too. Love her for who she is, for who God made her to be, and for who she’s shaped you to be.)

The wonderful thing about diva-moms is that they always seem so put-together, don’t they? They look beautiful in pictures.  But remember, pictures only capture a moment in time. Pictures are good for scrapbooks and magazines, yes. But life isn’t a scrapbook. Life isn’t a magazine either. Life is more like a cookbook. It’s complicated. It takes a lot of planning. A requires lot of ingredients, all fitting together at just the right moments. Sometimes, things get messy. Sometimes, things get gross. Sometimes, things don’t always turn out the way we planned, do they? Nope. And those are the exact times where Mom steps in.

     Diva-moms are like a snapshot of "beauty," yes. But my mom is pretty much the video reel of what a beautiful, loving woman/wife/mom looks like and is supposed to look like. She is beauty in action.

My mom knows who she is. And she knows who she isn’t.

She’s taught me to know who I am and know who I’m not.

She gives more than anyone I know. She actually probably gives too much!! (Mom, if you’re reading this, stop and go buy yourself something for a change.) 

Mom models the giving nature of Christ to me on a daily basis.

She serves more than anyone I know. Laundry. Lunches. Lost items. It matters not how old I get. Mom always seems to find a way to serve me.

     Now before you go thinking you want to trade moms, keep in mind my mom’s not perfect. Let’s be real: My mom frustrates me on some days. If you’re honest, yours does too. (I think that must be a pre-requisite skill to applying for Mommyhood.) But she “frustrates” me because she loves me. She says the things no one else will dare say to me. She does the things “only a mom can do,” etc. My mom may not be perfect, but she’s Godly. And she tries. And she cares. And she serves. And she gives. And she loves.

     Just recently, I recognized that having a mom who sometimes frustrates me is a great privilege. Sounds silly, right? But it’s not. It’s true. Some people don’t have their moms with them any longer. Some people have moms who don’t care or love them the way they should. Some people – even still - don’t even know who their moms are. If you have a mom or someone who has filled the place of a mom in your life, you should feel blessed beyond words.

     In case you happen to still be wondering, I did end up getting a card for my mom at Target. I had to find it in the very, very small not-a-diva-mom section at the back of the store. Just kidding. But I did find one.

     Also, I bought my mom a gift. My mom is one of the most difficult people in the world to shop for. And she's difficult to shop for because she typically finds out where I bought her stuff from, returns it, and takes the money to buy something for other people instead. I used to get frustrated by this; but this year, I’m encouraged. I recognize that no amount of material items I can purchase will quantify who my mom is and celebrate who she is and who she isn’t.

But I decided to buy her something small anyway.

This year, I bought her sandals. From Target. On sale.

On sale, because my momma raised me to look for deals and shop the sales.

At Target, because my mom is not a diva, but she’s still trendy in her own way.

Sandals, because she has wide feet and other shoes don’t always work out so well.

And shoes, because she’s a walking picture of the beauty of all that is implied by the word Motherhood.

One day, Momma, I hope to walk in shoes like yours. (And no, I don’t mean I want you to return the sandals I bought you, get the money, and try to get me some in my size instead. Just keep a gift for yourself already.) But what I do mean is this: I do hope to one day follow your example, walk in the footsteps you’ve laid out before me, and perhaps fill just a portion of the shoes you walk in. I love you, Momma. Thank you for being you.

With all said, I feel like I can get it right on Mother’s Day this year because I have a wonderful, Godly, beautiful Mom who’s gotten it right for days, weeks, months, and years on end. She makes it easy to recognize and celebrate that.

This year, you can get it right on Mother's Day too.

Reflect on these simply thoughts:

Who is your mom?

Who is she not?

And here's the big-kicker: How can you make it more about her than you tomorrow?