This weekend, I was blessed to have a couple days to spend with my husband, & my sweet girls got to spend some time with their grandparents. My husband and I went to see a marriage counselor yesterday, and one thing I noticed most that she did effectively was ask really good questions. Good questions are like sturdy buckets in a well. Depending on the question, the answers can go deep. Sometimes, instead of asking really well-crafted questions and going deep, we can get tripped up on questions that will lead us to empty wells every time. Here's an example and some scattered thoughts that came to my mind this morning:
So many times in life, things happen & we ask, "Why?"
"Why" isn't a bad question. It's normal. It's natural. And sometimes, it's necessary to examine in order to move forward. But oftentimes, "why" can be one of those questions that leave us sticking our empty buckets into the same old dried-up wells. Over and over and over again. Like a hurdle in a race that you can never seem to move past, "why" can stop us in our tracks and make us forget about the race we're supposed to be running and the goal/prize waiting for us as we press forward.
I ran across an old-familiar verse this morning. It was actually printed on a Christianbook.com shipping box sitting in my closet, it read, "Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. - Proverbs 3:5-6 NKJV" Only, in the reading of this verse on the box, the word 'acknowledge' was wearing off. That caught my attention because it can be easy to say we trust God. And it can be easy to admit that we don't have all the answers ("lean not to your own understanding"). But oftentimes, in the middle of big difficulties, we can fail to acknowledge God past being anything other than the recipient of our "why."
God uses the "why" moments of life to draw us to Himself, if we are compliant. So do not feel guilty if you've ever asked God "why." He loves it when His children approach Him with honesty-of-heart and all the rawness of life going on inside of us, just like we welcome our own children when they have difficulty in life.
If you'll hang with me just a moment, I want to take a minute and challenge the "why."
If God gave you an exact, precise answer to the "why" in your life, would you understand it completely or would it make you ask more questions?
Would it strengthen your faith or encourage your investigation (wanting to find out more and more resulting "why's")?
Would your newfound knowledge replace the margin in your life where trust in God once stood strong?
Would answering the "why" cause you to acknowledge God more or lean on your own understanding?
I know what my answers to those questions would be. And I am not trying to over-simplify it, the "why's" of life are big stuff.
Not only are they big stuff... I'll say this: they're big stuck.
I know that's not grammatically-correct way of saying it.
But ask yourself this:
Does the "why" change the "Who"?
Does the "why" change His love for you?
Does the "why" change His presence and care for you during the midst of it all?
Now think on this:
The "why" won't change your circumstances.
If the "why" won't change your circumstances or the One holding your circumstances, what exactly does it change?
Your focus.
It changes your focus.
Our "why's" oftentimes become our big stuck moments because they take our focus off of acknowledging God and unto our own understanding.
Today, I encourage you to ask God the "why," but don't get stuck there, choose to focus on the Who and His love for you.
When we filter everything through the Who, His character, His love & care for us, the actual answer to the "why" becomes far less important.
He's good.
He's sovereign.
He loves us without measure.
He has your ultimate good and His ultimate glory in mind.
And dropping your empty bucket into that well is one that will never, ever run dry.
Trust Him in that today.
