Skip to main content

Uncharted Waters

Uncharted Waters

I don't know about you, but my personality is very-much-so type A. I plan, I prepare,  and I expect everything to work out in the most perfectionistic way possible. (and yes, making up words is a part-time hobby of mine.)

Lately, I'm realizing now-more-than-ever that my expectations aren't readily lining up with my reality. 

As I realized this, I immediately had to ask myself...

Why? 
Is there an error in my planning? my preparations? my expectations?

Honestly, as I began to explore these thoughts… I acknowledged the answer I was looking for. The reasons my expectations aren't lining up with my reality is because I'm simply not being realistic about the demands I place on myself, the people around me, the situations I find myself in, and the future I have imagined since I was a little tyke scream-singing "deep and wide" into the family video camera.

Since I highly doubt that the sweet little video of my singing will ever be removed from the family video archives, my mind reverts there time and time again, noting that not only is God's love massively DEEP and thankfully WIDE….. but also, sometimes, LIFE is also DEEP and WIDE - and not always in a welcoming-huggy-embracing type of way, either.

Sometimes, the hurts and pains and disappointments in life run DEEP. They cut DEEP. They hit you in places so close to the core of who you are that they alter you. They change your perspective.  They affect your desires and passions. They provide you with an alternative direction in life. They affix who you are today and affect who you will become tomorrow. 

And sometimes, just because the sun sets and restarts into a new day, the hurts and pains and disappointments don't go away. Rather, they linger for WIDE margins of time… all the while, leaving us dazed. confused. wondering. wandering. lingering. and clinging onto anything that will give us hope.  (or, at the very least, give us an explanation for "why" things happen in the ways that they do.)

All of that beating-around-the-bush nonsense to say this: I feel as though I've entered a time/season of my life where I'm completely in the midst of uncharted waters.

The plans I've made have failed.

And the disappointment of it all, quite honestly, hurts.

But, in the midst of it all, I'd be the world's biggest fool to say that God's character is in jeopardy because of it all. Rather, in the midst of the madness, I feel God's character and presence in my life have been magnified. now more than ever.

Without a doubt, I know that God has a plan for me. 

And that it's nothing short of GOOD.

No matter how DEEP and WIDE this "uncharted water" season of my life may appear, I am reminded that God's love is so much deeper and so much wider and His plan is so much greater and higher than anything I could have ever even imagined on my own.

So instead of focusing on the failed plans,
the disappointment,
the hurt,
and the uncharted waters that lie all around me,
I choose to focus on the only One Who sustains - the Creator of the oceans that keeps me moving.

If you're not convinced that His love and His plan override everything that you're currently going through as well, I think I have something from the Hill family home video archives vault that you just might need to see.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

When Emotions Dance

When the clock strikes midnight, it’s time to get home.  But what we learn at the ball tonight, we need to make known.  Life’s not a party. It’s more of a dance. And thankfully, none of it is left to chance.  There IS an Orchestrator.  He chooses the songs - He handles the beat.  We simply decide what to do with our feet. For now, we sit at our table, content in our seats. We watch all the people.  We converse.  Laugh. And Repeat.  In walks Joy. (We all knew she was invited.)  Her presence alone makes everyone excited.  She’s an old friend, a sweet soul we all know.  She goes straight to the dance floor and (of course) steals the show.  Then suddenly, Joy steps off to the side.  It seems that something threw her off her stride.  It was him.  Everything changed when he entered in.  A sloppy, stinking young man walked through the door.  (People wonder if he’s ever been here before.)  With dirty cloth...
2 comments
Read more

For inquiring minds that would like to know… here's our story.

For some of you in my life, you've been asking, praying, and waiting to see something noteworthy happening in my dating life. So have I. Because I don't exactly know where to start, I'll simply begin at the beginning. Jeff and I both went to school together at Trinity Christian Academy here in Jacksonville from kindergarten to twelfth grade. From first grade to sixth grade, we had all the same teachers. Because our last names are so similar alphabetically (Hazard and Hill), we were seemingly ALWAYS sitting next to each other. Seriously. Always. Around. Each. Other. haha… For those of you that know me well or have known me for a long time, you know that God's done quite the work in my life over the years in chipping away some (note: not all) of my childhood sassiness and giving me a sweet spirit in its place. However, for those of you that knew me then, you would readily agree that I was quite the "over-confident little girl" (to quote my daddy). ...
2 comments
Read more

Fish Bowl Christianity

Fish Bowl Christianity Unlike many people, I never had a "family pet" as I was growing up. Never, ever. My mom was (and very-much-so still is) allergic to everything under the sun. Aaaand I had more siblings than your average American family, but without quite reaching Dugger-family-status. (or coming anywhere even close, whew!… side note: could you even imagine?!) These factors, added in with the fact that my parents spent every extra dime they had on private education for all five of us kids, really just weren't all-that-conducive to including a family pet of any sort. But don't feel sorry for me. I don't feel like I was jipped or anything. I love my family, and the memories I can still recall from my childhood are nothing short of classic. Pet or no pet. When I "grew up" and moved to Lynchburg about four years ago, I tossed around the idea of getting a pet. You know, just to see what it would be like. Nothing huge or fancy or gross or high-mainte...
Post a Comment
Read more