Lesson(s) Learned

Nobody likes dealing with raw chicken. It’s messy, slimy, and hard to work with. Most people prefer cooked chicken, seasoned to perfection.  The same way it goes in life. No one wants to deal with the raw and messy stuff; we prefer prepackaged order and predictability. However, life is more of the raw stuff than the seasoned and prepared stuff. Currently, I’m going through a rough time. Some doctors call it bipolar; others say it’s postpartum depression. At the end of the day, most of them have no clue what’s wrong with me. They give their best guess, but end up calling me a complicated case, a special case, a unique case, “not my hardest patient but surely not my easiest.” Those are hard words to hear and even harder to process. In the process, I’ve gained between 15-20 lbs. And am currently taking 6-7 different medications. this is by no means an easy or fun road. Right now, wait is the name of the game. Two weeks, and I go for bloodwork to see that my thyroid has...

Recently, I’ve been to far more doctors, counselors, etc. than I’d ever would have imagined. And what do all of them have in common? A waiting room. Some waiting room have TVs blaring, while others have soothing music daintily tiptoeing across the backdrop of silence. Some have people littered throughout due to missed appointments, late appointments, etc. Others are always empty. One has a random therapy dog that always comes out and waits for people to pet him. Almost all of them have magazines, books, puzzles, games, or something to occupy your mind while you wait. No matter what each waiting room has within it, they all have something in common. You have to wait to go there. On second thought, you go there just to wait. What you do during the wait time is determined by you, but no matter what: you wait. I’ve been realizing this is true in life as well. It has waiting rooms. Almost everyday for the last 3+months that I’ve battled this postpartum depression, I’ve asked, pleaded, ...

Hey. Okay. Say, you just meet someone new. What’s the first thing you usually ask them? ….Usually, it goes something like, “Hi, I’m so-and-so. What’s your name?” Their name. You’re usually concerned with a person’s name because it stands for the entirety of their identity. Think of famous people you know, and as soon as you think of their name, you think of something associated with them. The same thing is true for family members, close friends, co-workers, acquaintances, etc. A name holds a lot together, so you can be especially sure that I began to have difficulty when my name and identity began to get mixed up. Before I get ahead of myself, let’s start at the beginning. Hello. For those of you that do not know me, my name is Rosemary H Hazard. But for some reason, the hospital got it all confused. To them, I was Rosemary D Hazard. Many times over, I told them, “That’s not my name!” But for some reason, the bracelets, tags, stickers, etc. all said the same old thing. “ Rosema...

Messy Homes. Let's get real. We all have them at some time. You know how I know this to be true? Because we live in our houses. And life, well, it gets messy from time to time. Messy homes are far too easy to obtain. Have you ever noticed that things in your home - no matter how hard you try - tend towards disorder, disarray, and chaos rather than neatness, organization, peace, and tranquility? And all the moms of toddlers just said, "Amen." But seriously, in order to get a messy house, it's simple. Simply do nothing. Do a lot of nothing. For a relatively consistent span of time. And voila! Messy house status achieved. The other thing about messy homes that gets me is that cleaning a non-stop endeavor. Like, seriously, Non-stop. One night (or maybe it was a weekend?), when my husband was home from work, I was busily rushing around trying to complete everything on my cleaning/chore to-do list, so I could enjoy myself with the family (knowing all things were in ord...

While We Wait for Hope It’s been an incredibly long time since I’ve given any thought or attention to my blog and my writings, so I figured today (while we wait for Hope’s arrival onto the scene of life) was as good a day as any to pick it back up. I hope and pray my scattered words and thoughts are an encouragement for someone out there who’s taking the time to read this. Lately, as I’ve been awaiting the arrival of my second born, I’ve been somewhat reflective and pensive. I’ve been releasing my seemingly control of events and circumstances and embracing the fact that all is spiritual, purposeful, and a part of a much bigger plan than the one I’ve got developed in my little mind. God has a reason for everything. Every moment. Every instance within those moments. And that’s a neat thing to realize, embrace, cherish, and surrender yourself to. It truly is a beautiful thing.  Not only that, but I’ve also been thinking and reflecting on the importance of names and their m...