Raw, messy stuff

Nobody likes dealing with raw chicken. It’s messy, slimy, and hard to work with. Most people prefer cooked chicken, seasoned to perfection.

 The same way it goes in life. No one wants to deal with the raw and messy stuff; we prefer prepackaged order and predictability.

However, life is more of the raw stuff than the seasoned and prepared stuff. Currently, I’m going through a rough time. Some doctors call it bipolar; others say it’s postpartum depression. At the end of the day, most of them have no clue what’s wrong with me. They give their best guess, but end up calling me a complicated case, a special case, a unique case, “not my hardest patient but surely not my easiest.” Those are hard words to hear and even harder to process.

In the process, I’ve gained between 15-20 lbs. And am currently taking 6-7 different medications. this is by no means an easy or fun road.

Right now, wait is the name of the game. Two weeks, and I go for bloodwork to see that my thyroid has stabilized. Once my thyroid has stabilized, then we will focus on the pituitary gland tumor. Problem right now is that the surgery for that is only 30-40% effective, as these tumors grow back often. Other problem is that medication to shrink the tumor makes depression a whole lot worse. It’s going to take a skilled pharmacologist to figure everything out with all the medication I’m already on.

See I told you it’s 

Raw. Messy. Stuff.

And nobody likes it.

Especially not me.

Waiting on this season to end. Or should I say, waiting on my seasoning. Waiting on the day I can hear the timer on the oven going off. Knowing that my wait time is over. Chicken, it’s what’s for dinner.